Solitude
by dactylonomy
Summary: Kushina Uzumaki is dead.... Is that so? Kushina is revealed to be very much alive. What Kushina did and experienced is all in this story. Please read and review..:P
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: ** I don't own Naruto, though I wish I did! Naruto is owned by Masashi Kishimoto. Only the ideas contained within this story are mine.

Prologue

_Quiet and still, I wish the sands of time to be. But, alas, they seem to roll on faster. Sweet memories from long ago, from another life I used to know… My heart pains when I cannot hold onto moments and memories. Memories of bliss and beauty. Familiar words, an old, sweet song, and I'm carried back to so long. But pain seems to halt the clock's ever moving hands and makes me feel the agony ever deeply. An embrace, a breath, I long to envelope myself in such wonders for eternities. I knew not then, that they would be, someday, nothing more than a cherished memory. _

_***_

"Today is such a boring day, right, Naruto?", yawned an almost sleeping Konohamaru. Getting no answer from Naruto, Konohamaru stole a glance at him and rolled his eyes. Naruto was making disgusting noises while practically gormandizing up his Ramen. Konohamaru watched him with a totally appalled look on his face.

Naruto finally finished eating and then even stated _licking_the bowl. Konohamaru made a face. A everyone knew, Naruto's life was BASED on Ramen. Naruto then put on his wide sheepish smile and held out the bowl to old Teuchi. "More, please"

This time Konohamaru went berserk, his eyeballs disappearing the traditional way, and punched Naruto's face about five times before starting to verbally abuse him. "RAMEN, RAMEN, RAMEN!!!! Don't you have any other thing to do other than eating Ramen?!" He shrieked into Naruto's face. He spat out the deadly word Ramen again, making a revolted face. He used to like Ramen, but now because Naruto was so into it, he loathed it with all his heart.

Suddenly, Naruto got onto his stool and shouted. "Of course, I do something other than eating Ramen. I train. I train to be the next HOKAGE!" Konohamaru snorted. Naruto ignored him and continued. "And I'm, going to be exactly like the Fourth Hokage. He's the greatest." He then lowered his eyes. It was the Fourth Hokage who had sealed the spirit of the Nine Tailed Demon Fox inside Naruto and died.

Outside the Ramen Stand, stood a woman listening to Naruto's "speech". She was wearing a long dark purple cloak sliding down her tall, willowy and elegant figure. She was covering her head and part of her face with a black scarf. A strand of her fiery red hair had fallen over her stunningly beautiful blue eyes. She restrained her tears back, and tried to talk. But the words just seemed to shrivel in her throat. Despair claimed her. "Y-yes, N-naruto…" She whispered in her silvery voice, "Train hard. Train hard and become the- the next Hokage.. B-Be like the Fourth…..Hokage.. Your f-f-father" Tears poured down her cheeks which she hurriedly wiped away. She stole one last glimpse at Naruto before moving on. She didn't want to leave. She wanted to be with Naruto all her life, but she couldn't. She had covered her self so that the village people wouldn't recognize her.

She ran, ran to the Nakano River and sat down under a tree. After a few seconds of calming herself down, she let the soft sunlight caress her cheeks as her eyes surveyed the landscape around her. She slowly removed her cloak to reveal an extraordinarily attractive person, with beautiful red hair flowing down her spine like a rippling waterfall, mesmerizing sky blue eyes and stunning features. Her tall, slender body was clad in a long green satin dress which accentuated her grace even more. Though she was no doubt, the paragon of perfect beauty, her eyes showed a lot of grief. She sobbed softly as she took a framed photo out of the little bag she had been carrying. It was a photo of a very young couple. A very _happy _young couple. It was of her and Minato Namikaze, the Yellow Flash of Konohagakure. Kushina Uzumaki's tears gushed into a plethora of a flood as she thought of Minato, the Fourth Hokage, her true love and the father of Naruto. She had lost her lover as he had gifted his life to save the village, then she was torn apart from her son almost at once too. Naruto. "Naruto…it's a beautiful name", Kushina whispered. That was 13 years ago. She whimpered in misery as her memory was resuscitated. The memory of 13 years ago, October 10…


	2. Crime

Chapter 1: Crime

Kushina was in her bedroom, the day Minato died, nursing her newborn son, Naruto. Kushina thought she would have a feeling of total hatred towards Naruto now, after what happened, but he was her most treasured possession. She would never let anyone even touch him.

That was when a chilly wind blew into her room, making the curtains flutter. Kushina turned to the window and looked on with her teary eyes, wishing that, by some miracle, Minato was not dead, and would materialize right in front of her eyes. But, nothing happened. The ghastly wind kept on blowing making her shiver with coldness, and at the same time, fright. Hugging her baby closely, she got out of her bed and went up o the window. She looked into the sky and saw the silver moon coming out from behind the torn, black clouds. _Even the heaven is making complaint… _she sighed. She closed the window. But, still she felt cold, and frightened. Something was just not right. Not right at all. She felt as if some cold slime was being smothered on her making tiny chill blains appear, one by one.

"Kushina chan" A snake like hissing voice came from behind her. Kushina felt the hair on the back of her head standing up. She widened her eyes, and turned around bewildered. In a corner of her room stood someone who looked very familiar. He had long black hair up to his waist. His skin colour was so pale. It was white. Kushina strongly felt that she had seen him somewhere. That hair, skin colour, was all _too _familiar. Then suddenly, she had a fleeting memory. Minato had shown her a photo of Jiraiya-san's group photo when teenagers one day. This person here was in the photo too. It was one of Jiraiya-san's teammates. Kushina was engulfed in a pool of fear. Jiraiya-san had said that this man was very dangerous and craved for power, a Missing-nin.

"O-or-orochi-orochimaru-san?" Orochimaru gave a malicious smile. Kushina trembled, every beat in her heart crying out one name: Naruto. "Oh oh, Kushina Uzumaki. You seem to know me," he said, pronouncing all his words clearly as he walked around the young mother taking well calculated strides. Kushina swallowed loudly. "Wh-what do you want, Orochimaru-san?" Orochimaru laughed vindictively. "What I want, Kushina? I want that baby in your arms," he snickered, his mouth turning into an ugly grin. Kushina flared up at this. "Don't you even dare touch Naruto, Orochimaru! If you-" "Ah hah! So his name is Naruto, is it?" Orochimaru walked around Kushina once again, eying the baby. Kushina hugged Naruto tightly. "But, there is a problem, Kushina _chan,_" he continued, "I'm going to kill your son and get the spirit inside him, and please, don't interrupt, if you want him to live, then you must come to the Sound Village with me. If you do, I promise, I won't hurt a single hair of….ah….Naruto."

Kushina widened her eyes. She was extremely terrified now. She didn't know what to do. She had heard of the Sound Village. Minato had told her all about it. It was Orochimaru's personal village founded for the express purpose of collecting ninja for his experiments and his quest to learn all jutsu. "And why would I be so sure of _you _of all people?" "You're testing my patience too much, Kushina. I keep all promises I make. If you don't believe in me," he said, his tone getting quicker and quicker, "I think I'll just have to –," he prepared to grab Naruo. Kushina jumped backwards. "No! No. Don't. I'll come with you. But…what's of my use to you?" Orochimaru smiled wickedly. "Kushina, Kushina, Kushina. You think like a kid. Oh, I forgot. You _are_ one of course. Young and unmarried. Anyway, you'll be very important to me. Don't underestimate yourself. It _is_ a known fact, Kushina, that Minato loved you more than anyone else in this whole world." Kushina lowered her eyes, unable to restrain her tears. "And he taught secret fighting techniques only known to him."

Now Kushina realized what Orochimaru wanted. She flared her nostrils, her eyes alive with intensified anger. "Never, ever in _my_ life will _I_ teach you them, Orochimaru! Don't you even dare _think_ that!" Orochimaru laughed, cynicism intensifying every second. "Kushina, Kushina… You're not exactly thinking of the consequences, are you? I'll give you exactly 5 seconds to think of the consequences, Kushina, 5 seconds."

Kushina raised her eyebrows and grimaced, hatred brimming inside her. She knew what Orochimaru wanted. If she didn't go to the Sound Village with him, he would kill Naruto. She would never want that to happen, but at the same time, she could not betray her village by teaching Orochimaru the jutsu. Worse, it would be like betraying Minato. She HAD to tell someone.

"All right. I'll come with you. But, can't I stay just one more day?" Orochimaru just laughed. "You think I'm that stupid, Kushina? I know what you're going to do. If you stay one more day, you'll be able to tell someone about me. Who? Hiruzen Sarutobi?" He grinned sardonically. Kushina lowered her eyes. Orochimaru wasn't that stupid. It was stupid of _her _to imagine that he would be. "But, I have to tell someone about this, right? Otherwise how would anyone know what had happened to me?"

"When someone comes tomorrow morning to this room, you'll be found dead, of course." He answered in a matter of fact way.

A strange feeling of eeriness flooded Kushina's body. She couldn't believe Orochimaru was just about commit a deadly crime. Anyway, the crime was committed. A Replacement jutsu was performed and a lifeless body of Kushina was left on her bed next to Naruto.

Kushina was taken to Otogakure, the Sound Village that night by Orochimaru.


	3. Arrival

Chapter 2: Arrival

Kushina shivered as she entered the hostile looking village of Otogakure. The unwelcoming darkness…

She shuddered. The guards at the main gate stared at her in such a way, it made her scared out of her wits. Kushina covered her fiery red head with her purple cloak. Suddenly, she literally jumped out of her skin as Orcohimaru ran his icy cold fingers along her arm. She pulled back immediately and snarled at Orochimaru.

Orochimaru just snickered. She felt a strange eeriness flowing down her spine.

_To weave a future full of happiness and peace I wished. Now that magic web has crumbled away...._

She knew she would never be free now. She would never be safe. She would never be happy.

Kushina suddenly burst into a silent sob as she thought of the bright future she had planned with Minato. Her heart pained as her mind echoed with the name Naruto. Kushina restrained her tears and looked into the world in front of her which shimmered in deep unfriendliness and darkness. This was going to be her new life now. A hard life full of sadness and loneliness.

Orochimaru took her into some strange looking place. The kind of place she positively hated. A tall official looking building with hostility practically radiating from it.

"Kushina, THIS is going to be your new home" Orochimaru smiled sardonically. Kushina felt as if the whole world was crumbling around her. She certainly wasn't prepared for this ugliness.

"I was going to keep you in my house, but my heart counseled against it. I knew you would like bright places. And this is the best. See, I _was _being very rational and sympathetic towards you, Kushina", continued the snake like voice with sarcasm intensifying every millisecond.

Kushina gasped with horror. If this was the friendliest place in Otogakure........  
Kushina burst into tears and fell at Orochimaru's feet.  
"Orochimaru-san, please, please let me go.... I would never ever survive here. And- and I-I would NEVER tell anyone what you did to me. I won't even go to Konohagakure. I would go to some other place. Please, please let m-me go... PLEASE!!!!" , She wailed.

Orochimaru remained smiling and shrugged his long black hair off his shoulders. "Nonsense, Kushina chan. _YOU _are one of the few people who would invariably survive here. You are one of the strongest people I know. Both physically and mentally."

Kushina whimpered, her misery expanding even more. "Not now, Orochimaru. Right now, I'm the weakest person you could ever imagine"

Orcohimaru just shook his head quite maliciously. "That is why I decided you must rest for about two days. Then you would be up and about, then you could start teaching me."

Kushina just sighed in intensified sadness and helplessness. It would, of course be hopeless to make Orochimaru sympathise her. Of course. She was stupid to even think that.

_I have to cope up with it. My life is over now. I lost Minato and Naruto. My life is over. _


	4. Sibling

**A/N-This is Kushina's life after 3 years, and how she survived and survives. :P Hope this story does sound like a drag... Please read, anyway..**

Chapter 3: Sibling

Kushina looked into the gloomy village sitting at her room window. She watched as the evening slowly invaded the purgaratory. _Purgatory, _she thought, he lips forming a tiny ghost of a smile which lasted only for about two seconds. _A very appropriate name..._

She sighed deeply as she rested her chin on the windowsill.  
It was her third year in this horrible underworld. Three years meant to be spent in Konohagakure with Minato and Naruto wasted here. Here in Otogakure as a simple maid.

Orochimaru, was, she had to admit, an extremely fast learner. He had learnt everything in no time at all. She had to give him that.  
But even after teaching him, Orochimaru had not let Kushina go home. Of course, that was expected, but Kushina had to, instead, be his maid.  
His maid of all people!

Kushina sighed remorsefully. There was no point of crying now. She didn't even think she had tears left in her body now. She had cried such a lot at the beginning.  
There was one thing she was partially happy about, though. It was the fact that she hadn't taught Orochimaru all the fighting techniques. There were five she hadn't taught. Five very powerful ones. Right now, she didn't even want to think of them since they reminded her of the days she spent with Minato.

_Minato, Miinato, Minato...  
_Kushina pinched her fingers as hard and sharply as she could and watched the blood trickle out onto the wood of the windowsill. Why couldn't she stop thinking of him? Why was she obsessing over him like an infatuated teenager?  
She held her breath. She was just too hopelessly in love. And Naruto... She didn't want to think of him.

How irrevocable her life was. How irreversible could fate get?

Kushina forced all thoughts out of her head and concentrated on herself. She wondered what she looked like now. Three was a long period, and anything could have happened to her.  
There was no mirror anywhere where she could look at herself. She supposed she had changed a lot. She realized, of course, that she had lost quite a lot of weight.  
Her hair had grown to some extent too, but she trimmed it every two months.

Was she still beautiful as she was earlier? Did her bright blue eyes still look as stunning and lively as ever? Kushina knew she was being very vain, but, she had been beautiful and she definitely knew it.

She looked at the dark sky. The torn, black clouds were slowly jostling for position. As expected, raindrops slowly began to drop onto the earth.  
Kushina waited for a few seconds till the speed increased, and opened the window. A cold wind blew into the room and Kushina trembled. Something of this scene reminded her of the day Orochimaru came to her room three years ago...

She shuddered. She put her long slender fingers out, and let the water wash away all the blood of the wound she had just inflicted upon herself.  
She took her hands inside and watched on as the gloomy evening deepened.  
Then quite suddenly, she saw a dark figure appearing from far away. This figure could have been anyone. There were so many people in Otogakure. But, this person seemed different.  
Different, yet incredibly familiar. Kushina straightened up, furrowed her eyebrows and squinted at the figure.

She couldn't figure who this was. But she wanted-no _needed _to see who it was.

Suddenly, the figure came to light. The face was recognizable. Kushina gasped and backed away, clapping her hands to her mouth. She closed her eyes.

_She looked into his dark brown eyes. She couldn't believe the irreversible hate in them. The determination...  
Much as she feared him, she also loved him to death... She couldn't let him go.  
"Brother...Brother, please don't go."_

_"Brother?', he scoffed, "You should have realized by now that I'm not your brother."_

_Kushina tried hard to keep up with him as he took fast strides to the river. _

_"Brother" she winced._

_He turned and glared at her with those dark eyes of his.  
"GO..." He snarled furiously.  
_

_"But, Brother, I love you"_

_And everything went black._

Kushina opened her eyes. Then for the first time since she came here, she smiled. She smiled a very wide smile so radiantly, no one would believe she had lead a bleary and dark period of life. She was too happy and radiant now, she felt as though she would burst.

_My brother is back! _She wanted to scream out loud. _And he's not dead! _Kushina felt heavy teardrops staining her cheeks; tears of extreme bliss and happiness. _Brother!_

She quickly wiped her tears and bounded down the stairs to the entrance downstairs. She was now living in Orochimaru's house.

When she arrived at the main entrance door, Orochimaru had already welcomed him. Kushina's heart pounded. She smiled widely and ran to hug him.

"Brother!" She squealed with delight and wrapped her arms around him. She felt as though she was hugging a statue, while he remained quite motionless. But not a care she had. Her brother was here, and that was all that mattered.  
But suddenly, she was pushed backwards. Kushina looked at him quite alarmed.

Was this actually her brother, or had she made a terrible blunder?

It was Nagato. Nagato had changed quite alot. The bright red hair which used to grow over his eyes, was cut now. The way he looked now, reminded Kushina painfully of Minato.

_Minato... Nagato would have been the perfect brother-in-law. _

Kushina observed her brother more. There were quite alot of piercings on his face. Yes. Nagato had changed. ALOT. Kushina couldn't belive the extent of his changing. But, his eyes gave away his identity of Nagato Uzumaki. The same familiar kindness, generosity was hidden amidst the other various glints of his dark brown eyes.

This was Nagato Uzumaki,and no one else.

Nagato Uzumaki, her elder brother. Her closest childhood confidant.

**A/N: Yeah, I know Nagato is like no way related to Kushina, but anyway...**

**once again, I do NOT own Naruto  
**


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